I still can access this journal. Hello there, this is Mark at 28.
I've finally settled in Australia! I kept telling myself that life here is better, but I have my own share of bigger problems, risks and responsibilities. I feel like I'm in a more precarious situation because the Mark I see in the mirror at 17 is still the same Mark I see now: still scared shitless.
BUT--I've learned that, after all that I've been through, self love is possible. That you should take care of yourself. That you are your longest commitment.
Days when I like the person staring back at me are definitely longer. Sometimes I regress into the old victim that I see myself, but with the help of people around me I get over it. Hopefully this is an indication that I am being kinder to myself and that I have more sense of agency into my life--something I've never considered a possibility for most of my growing years.
Probably noteworthy to give you (me in another ten years) an update on how my present life is.
1. I went to Australia last July 2016 to take up Master of Data Science at Monash Uni. It was a rough ride. I still consider 2017 to be my worst year (second to 2007--not sure why there's a pattern) but the battle scars made me proud of who I've become. I am now employed on a full-time, fixed term basis (again after 3 years!), hopefully something permanent will come up soon.( Collapse )